Shape

Ryder and Lexi

Excerpt From: M. J. Roberts. “Rock Hard: Chord Brothers, Book 1.”

I blink. I stare down at her, and my brain refuses to understand. My tongue plasters to the roof of my mouth. Lexi reaches up and touches my biceps, and the spell that has me frozen is temporarily broken.
“Ryder? Ryder, say something.”

I blink again.
“Lexi. I’m not sure what you mean. I’m right here.”
Her voice is soft. So soft I have to bend down a little to hear her. I’ve been playing drums long enough that I have a bit of hearing loss.
“I can’t sleep without you. I haven’t been able to sleep since Detroit.”
I straighten up. “Sure, you have,” I say like an idiot. “You don’t toss and turn. You don’t get up.” I think of myself, the hours I spend staring at the ceiling of my own bunk.
“But I don’t really sleep, not well. Not deep sleep. Not like I slept when I was with you.”
Lexi takes a step closer, and the smell of bursting orange blossoms wafts up.
“Ryder…” she says softly.
She opens the sash of her robe, and it reveals a mostly see-through, burgundy-tinted babydoll nightgown that barely reaches the top of her thighs.
“Fuuuuck“ I groan.
“Lexi, we can’t.”
She closes that last inch between us and plants a tiny kiss on my chest. The barest of touches. And I snap.
I grab her, haul her up my body, and smash our lips together. In two giant steps I’ve got her pressed against the wall, her legs wrapped around me, all the pent-up need and want I’ve been so good at keeping caged in, tethered, is pulsing out into her. I fist her hair, tilt her head, and plunder her mouth.
Fuck. God. She tastes so good. Incredible. God. Fuck.
“Lex…” I say as I break away.
“More,” she breathes.
“We shouldn’t,” I manage.
“Right,” she says, but then she kisses me again, and fuck, I don’t give a damn, because, yes, this is Lexi, and all I can think about is tasting her again, more, yes. How soft her tongue is and how out of control I am. I carry her to the bed and part of me tries to reel it in, take it slow, but I don’t want to. Not even a little.
I want to devour her. Every single inch.
Lexi. My Lexi.
Yes.
Then I’m on top of her and nothing has ever felt more right in the whole world. The blood is pounding in my ears, and I kiss down her neck and then my hands are on her breasts, God, her breasts. I can’t think, everything becomes a haze of pure lust, heat, a throbbing sound of need, the contrast between hard and soft, and the perfection of our rhythm together.
I manage to break for a second. “Lex, are you sure?”
“So sure.”
I kiss down her body, stopping briefly over the lace that plays peek-a-boo over beauties I definitely want to lavish later and continue to head south because I am desperate to taste her. I get to her hip when she stops me with a firm hand.
“No.”
I lift my head up. “No?”
“No. Not that.”

“Why?”
She shakes her head.
I climb back up her body, until we’re face-to-face. “Lexi, why?”
She shakes her head again, clearly embarrassed. And ashamed. Okay. I have a few guesses as to why this might be, and I want to let her know that’s absolutely not the case. I have one guess as to the asshole who might have made her feel that way. Time to nip this one in the bud.
“Can we just not talk about it right now, please? Please?”
I start to shake my head no.
“Everything is so perfect, my God, so perfect. And I’ve dreamed of this for so long.”
Record scratch to stop. “You what?”
She blushes.
“You know.”
I shake my head. I don’t know.
“I mean, I’ve dreamed of having you this way for years.”
My voice goes up. A lot. “You what?”
She blushes again, slightly deeper. She doesn’t say anything, so I try and take that in. But I can’t, I just can’t picture it. Finally, clearly dumbfounded, I say, “You thought of us… this way?” She doesn’t answer with words, but her face says yes.
“How come I never knew? How come you never did anything?”
“You never knew because you’re a dumbass. And I never did anything because Jase would kill me.”
Well if that isn’t like a bucket of cold water to the face.
I force myself to roll off her.
“Hey! That doesn’t mean I want you to stop.”
“Lexi, we can’t do this. Rule number one of band rules is you never ever get involved with anyone else in the band, because when it ends, and it always will, and eventually it ends badly, then the band breaks up. In our case it’s not just you and me it’s…” I slam the brakes on that one because I know it’s more complicated than just Lexi and me, or me and my friendship with Jase. It’s me and my past, and that’s something I can’t even think about. “Not to mention there’s the bro code.”
“Fuck the bro code.”
I can’t help it, I smile at that.
“You don’t know, you’re not a bro.”
“Thank God for that.”
“So, we’re back to the friend zone. This was a near miss,” I say.
“Ah-huh,” she says. Then she rolls on top of me, bends her knees and fits her core to my still hard erection, rocks back and forth, and I’m completely gone. She puts her hands flat on my chest. A frenzy explodes inside of me. I grab her hips and can’t let go.
She’s so wet I can feel her through my boxers, and I need her so badly. She’s wanted me for years.
For years.
“Lexi, my jeans. Condom. My jeans.” I reach a hand toward the floor, vaguely in that direction, and she scurries off and is back in less than a second.
“I want to blow you first.”
“Next time. Can’t wait.” So hot. “Hurry. Wallet.”
She starts to fumble. I rip my jeans out of her hands. I have my boxers down and the condom on in record time. Then, oh, she’s lowering herself onto me and my senses come back for a millisecond and I slow her hips.
“Lex, look at me.”

She does.
“Breathe, baby.”
She takes a calming breath. We’ve always protected Lexi. She might be a liberal musician, a wild child in theory, but she’s not that experienced. It’s been a while for me. I have no idea how long it’s been for her. I suspect years.
I have to make this good for her. That’s the number one priority. I have to make it last for more than a minute and a half, which is how long I feel I can hold out right now with the glorious speed, and energy, and heat.
“Slow, baby.”
“Why? Whywhywhywhywhy?”
It sounds like a whine.
I smile at her. “Because you are the most magnificent creature in the whole world, and I want to make it last.”
“Nooooooo,” she cries, and tries to force herself down on me.
I smile again. I totally love her.
“Yes,” I say. I lower her onto me inch by slow agonizing inch. She opens her knees slightly wider, throws her head back, and moans.
Once she’s fully seated, I grab her hips tighter and don’t let her move for minute.
She presses down harder with her palms. “I’m ready, Ryder. I’m ready, ready-ready.”
“Do it, baby.”
Lexi gives me a shy smile, and pleasure shoots through me. She moves, the up-and-down; fire rips through me, so hard, so fast, I have to grit my teeth to keep control. She’s so beautiful. That it’s her, that I know her so well, makes it the best experience of my life, and we’re just getting started.
It’s a magnificent storm of pleasure. Her sounds are almost violent, a huge in breath on the upbeat and a hard, loud, moan on the down-stroke.
Every sense I have is alive. I’m buried inside her perfect, soaking heat. Her hands are hot on my chest. Her breasts are glorious as they sway. Every vice I’ve ever indulged in pales compared to the hurricane starbursts of sexual sweetness that are bombarding me, one after another.
She bounces up and down on me, and I rock and thrust up into her. It’s sublime. Our fit is beyond perfect. The tension builds and builds, lightning in a jar, barely captured, ready to explode.
Lexi’s hands curl into my shoulders. I grab her hips harder, and my world shifts. My throat constricts, like there’s so much my soul wants to say but my body won’t let it.
I hold out as long as I can, and when she screams, I shudder one last time and have the best, wildest release I’ve ever had.
She laughs; it’s a completely joyous sound. She flops off me, and I get up to dispose of the condom. I get back in bed, and she snuggles up against me. She throws one leg over me and settles her body comfortably against my chest.
The Weekend’s What You Need spins forward on my mental jukebox.
“I guess we won’t have any trouble sleeping now,” I say.
“You got that right.” She yawns loudly. Maybe it’s a fake, but I still enjoy it.