Think of your closest friend. You do everything together — parties, nights in on the couch, trips to Target. You might even say “I love you.”

But that doesn’t mean you’re in love, or that you want a sexual relationship with them. This is a platonic relationship, and it's just as valuable as a romantic relationship. It's a safe space filled with warm, fuzzy platonic feelings where you can be loved and accepted just for being yourself, minus the romance and sexual intimacy. 

There are many types of relationships, and platonic bonds are often some of the most intimate and profound. Here's what they are, how to recognize them, and why they’re essential to a fulfilled life.  

What is a platonic relationship?  

A platonic relationship is a deep, meaningful, and unique connection with someone that isn’t romantic or sexual. Think of those friends, family members, and even coworkers you can talk to for hours about anything and everything. You understand each other without being in love or wondering if you ever will be. It’s intimacy without the sexual strings attached.

“Platonic” comes from Plato’s studies. He conceptualized a new type of love as transcending the body in favor of the soul. Although he never actually used the term “platonic,” it’s come to represent an anti-romantic kind of intimacy that matches perfectly with modern close friendships.

Platonic relationships typically focus on emotional closeness and genuine respect for each other. These people appreciate you for who you are on the inside, not for how you look or your dating potential. And with so much emphasis on romantic and physical intimacy in society, platonic love can feel like a breath of fresh air. 

Platonic love versus romantic love 

Platonic and romantic love are different, but both types of relationships can have a strong foundation of deep friendship. Platonic relationships are sexless relationships that don't cross the boundary into sexual intimacy, even if affection, attraction, and desire are there. There's no sex at all, though many people in platonic relationships are physically affectionate through non-romantic cuddling, hugging, or holding hands. 

Romantic relationships typically come with feelings of affection and strong love, and many also include sexual relationships. It's not just about sharing your hopes and dreams, though that plays a role. People in romantic relationships experience romantic love, which goes beyond the platonic. People in a platonic relationship might love each other, but they aren’t in love with each other. 

The bottom line? Platonic love is a close friendship without sexual intimacy, while romantic love, whether it's casual dating or more long-term, is a deep connection that often includes sexual intimacy. Both types of love are valuable and meaningful, just in different ways. 

5 signs of platonic love  

Not sure if you're in a platonic relationship? Here are some clear signs that set this relationship type apart from romantic or sexual pairings: 

1. Closeness: You get each other, and there's a shared feeling of common ground, whether it's hobbies, beliefs, or life experiences. This closeness is about being on the same wavelength rather than physically intimate.

2. Honesty: In a platonic relationship, you can be your true self, including speaking your mind. You don't need to sugarcoat things or hide your feelings, and you trust that the other person will understand you and be honest in return.  

3. Acceptance: You feel completely comfortable and at ease with the other person — like you can let your guard down and just be you, complete with all your flaws and quirks. There's no pressure to conform to unrealistic standards, be someone you're not, or impress anyone.

4. Understanding: You understand and respect each other's needs and boundaries. Instead of needing constant attention from each other, you appreciate one another's independence and individuality. 

5. Lack of sexuality: You and this person don’t have sex. There might be sexual tension or even a crush, but that doesn’t take away from your emotional connection. Maybe you’ve talked about how you’ll never have sex, or you feel confident that any twinge of attraction won’t go anywhere. The relationship could stop being platonic later on, but if it’s non-sexual or non-romantic now, it’s platonic.

5 types of platonic relationships  

From the bonds you form with friends to your individual experiences with your colleagues, these relationships are pillars of support — no sex required. Here's a look at some of the most common types of platonic relationships: 

1. Bromance

“Bromance” — a “romance” between bros — refers to a super-close, non-sexual friendship between two people identifying as men. People often use “bromance” to poke fun at close male friends, but there’s nothing wrong with two men who can share their deepest fears and biggest dreams without hesitation. 

2. Womance

A “womance” — the same thing as a bromance, but between two women — is an equally solid and affectionate bond between two people identifying as women, though the term is less frequently used. This is the kind of friendship where two women can talk about anything and everything and always feel seen, heard, and validated.

3. Cross-gender friendship

Who says boys and girls can’t be friends? Perhaps the most common use of the term “platonic,” people often use it to describe friendships between men and women who don’t have sexual feelings for each other. It’s easy to assume a straight man and a straight woman who are close friends are secretly in love (or doing the deed), but some are just platonic. 

4. Work spouse 

The concept of a “work spouse,” such as a “work wife” or “work husband,” refers to a close platonic relationship between coworkers. These colleagues share office gossip, seek advice from each other, and rely on one another for support during those long work days. This relationship is often built on mutual respect and humor, and while there's no romantic or sexual activity, the level of closeness mirrors that of marriage — which makes sense because work spouses see each other almost every day. 

5. Mentor and mentee 

This platonic relationship is unique for its roots in personal or professional growth and development. A mentor guides, advises, and supports a mentee about a particular topic, and it's the mentee's job to learn and evolve. This relationship is borderline familial, but it comes from respect, trust, and a shared commitment to personal or professional progress.  

What are the benefits of a platonic relationship? 

Platonic relationships are so much more than just having someone to hang out with. These deep friendships are great for the mind, body, and soul — and have a surprising list of health and emotional benefits. Here's an overview of some of the main perks of having close non-sexual relationships: 

1. Improved health 

Studies show that platonic love can boost your immune system, reduce your risk of various diseases, and decrease your chances of having depression and anxiety. Those are three great reasons to keep in touch with close friends and build platonic connections that offer mental and emotional support.  

2. Lower stress 

Platonic friendships can also help lower stress. The emotional support helps you work through problems and avoid the effects of chronic stress — which often includes heart problems, digestive issues, and high blood pressure. 

3. Increased resilience 

Research shows that having solid friendships is one of the most significant predictors of a person's ability to recover from trauma and stress. Your platonic friends are like your personal cheerleaders, supporting you through rough patches related to work, home life, or even health issues. The love and validation you get from non-romantic partners help you become more resilient and equip you to handle life's challenges.  

4. Emotional support 

Sometimes, you just need someone to listen, validate your feelings, and be there for you — without romance and physical intimacy. Platonic relationships provide safe spaces for open communication, whether you need to vent or need advice on a situation. Your platonic connections know you well, and they’ll always give you a shoulder to cry on.

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