Wellness
How To Prepare For Anal Sex For A Safe, Enjoyable Time
Ready to try something new but don’t know where to start? Learn how to prepare for anal sex to ensure the pleasure goes both ways.
By Quinn · December 5, 2023 · 6 min read
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The human body is full of erogenous zones, and you’re probably familiar with some of them — the ecstasy of a clitoral orgasm, the joy of finding your G-spot, stimulating your partner’s prostate.
What many people don’t realize is that the anus is packed with sensory nerves that can lead to incredibly powerful orgasms. You can reap some of the benefits just by having your anus stimulated during vaginal penetration or oral sex. But if you’re ready to experience your first anal orgasm, knowing how to prepare for anal sex will help make the experience the best it can be.
Anal sex covers any sexual act that involves the anus. This includes men penetrating their partners and women (or other penis-free people) wearing strap-on dildos to have anal sex with a partner of any gender, a practice known as pegging.
Anal fingering also counts, as does anilingus, aka anal-oral sex (colloquially known as a rim job, rimming, or tossing the salad). You can also use all sorts of sex toys for butt play, such as anal beads, butt plugs, and prostate massagers.
Safety should be a top concern no matter the type of sex you’re engaging in — including anal. Here are some risks present when enjoying this activity.
You can contract sexually transmitted infections (STIs) from any type of sex, including oral. But since the rectal lining is thinner than other parts of the body, the risk of bacteria and viruses entering the bloodstream is higher with anal sex. Infections spread in this way are known as anorectal STIs.
Here are some of the infections to aware of in relation to anal sex, most of which condoms and good hygiene can help you avoid:
Syphilis
Chlamydia
Gonorrhea
Human immunodeficiency virus (HIV)
Herpes simplex virus (HSV)
Human papillomavirus (HPV)
Bacterial vaginosis (BV)
Gastrointestinal (GI) illnesses
Urinary tract infection (UTI)
Because the rectal lining is so delicate, it tears easily. These tiny tears are known as anal fissures, and while they’re not serious, they can be painful and cause bleeding after anal sex or a bowel movement. They also give bacteria and viruses easy entry into the bloodstream, which is why condoms are so important for safe anal sex.
Don’t let this one scare you too much. It’s very rare to experience a perforated colon (a tear in the small intestine’s lining) as a result of anal sex. But it’s technically possible, and you should keep this risk in mind when considering the size and shape of the objects you use.
Some of the infections on our list are pretty alarming, but with the proper precautions, you can greatly reduce the risks. Here are some tips for protecting your health:
Use condoms: You can help prevent STIs, BV, and UTIs by using a new condom every time there’s penetration, including switching out condoms when transitioning from anal to vaginal sex (and vice versa).
Practice good hygiene: You can’t wash away an STI. But using cleansing wipes before anal sex and showering after can help prevent bacteria from making their way to places they don’t belong.
Get tested: Regular STI testing ensures both partners can make informed decisions about their sexual health.
Learning how to have anal sex in a way that’s both safe and enjoyable doesn’t just mean understanding what to do at the moment of penetration. Our guide includes steps you can take to prepare, along with aftercare to ensure you feel great when it’s all over.
Communicate: Communication is a central part of any healthy sexual relationship. Like with all sex activities, establish clear boundaries and ensure all parties consent to what’s about to happen. And remember that people can revoke consent at any time.
Eat appropriately: This one is subjective. If you’re lactose intolerant or sensitive to spice, don’t load up on ice cream or Mexican food before a scheduled anal session. You know your body best, so save the foods and drinks that get your bowels moving until you’re done.
Clean up: Most doctors don’t recommend anal douching since it can damage your rectal mucosa (the inner lining of your rectum), making you more susceptible to disease. If you’re mindful about what you eat and pay attention to the cues your digestive system gives you, douching isn’t necessary, anyway. Anal cleaning can be as simple as washing the area with gentle soap.
Relax: Deep breathing, massage, and foreplay can loosen you up before the big event. If you’re not in a rush, tantric meditation might help you and your partner connect on a deeper level to relax even further.
Lubricate: Unlike the vagina, the rectal area doesn’t self-lubricate in response to arousal. To make the experience more enjoyable and less damaging to your rectum, use a high-quality lube that’s oil or silicone-based. Avoid water-based lubes — their low pH is designed for vaginal use and can contribute to infection when used anally.
Start slowly: Gradual penetration can make the experience less painful. Ease into it, and keep the communication flowing to help your partner know how fast to go.
Find a position that works for you: Experiment with sex positions to find one that feels right for you and your partner. You can even be on top for more control, which may comfort a partner who’s concerned about causing you pain.
Make adjustments as needed: Apply more lubricant, switch up positions, and take a break as needed. Remember, the experience should be enjoyable for both of you.
Clean up: Using a condom will help keep the mess to a minimum, but you’ll likely both want to freshen up after. And if you use any sex toys, clean them according to the manufacturer’s instructions.
Practice aftercare: What happens after sex can be just as meaningful as the act itself — sometimes even more so. Spend time communicating and connecting emotionally to ensure you both feel cared for and supported.
To have the best experience possible, here are some of our favorite tried-and-true tricks.
Experiment with butt play during masturbation so you can learn your preferences and limits without the pressure of a partner. Look for toys specifically designed for anal stimulation, and try out new techniques to determine what feels best.
Before you start, lay out a towel you wouldn’t mind throwing out in a worst-case scenario. It will protect both your sheets and your peace of mind.
For an extra layer of hygiene, have your partner wear latex gloves during foreplay. This can also help prevent their fingernails from causing discomfort. If either partner has a latex allergy, find a suitable alternative, and take the allergy into account when condom shopping.
Sexual exploration is meant to be fun and educational. That’s why we made Quinn, the audio erotica app created by women for the world. Our wide range of erotic content will arouse you, introduce you to new kinks, and remind you that sex is a normal, healthy part of life.
To access thousands of audio stories and guided masturbation sessions, download the Quinn app for iOS or Android.
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